Time

I've gotten lost in thoughts of how quickly time passes a lot here lately. I know we all make mention and question where it has gone, but lately I've noticed the wrinkles on my face growing a little deeper, my parents are growing very much older and my children are changing at light speed. I've been at the same job for seventeen years and each passing day just keeps adding to the tally marks. Every day is truly a remarkable gift for each of us, yet if you are anything like me, its such a rush and a blur that you hardly find time to breath. Today I wondered where I'm trying to get in such a hurry.

With every passing second everything around us is changing. I find myself finding comfort in the things that seem to be timeless, like the bird that always builds it's nest in the same spot above the light at work and the way the sun sets over the hill from my front porch this time of year. I find myself stopping to look at it and realizing that while change is good, sometimes those things we can count on to always be the same are just as amazing. If we are lucky we find a person that becomes timeless to us. Regardless of the wrinkles on their face or the sagging of their skin, there is comfort in knowing they will always be the same. Their heart never changes. Their embrace never changes.

While we are all on this journey and moving forward and aging and changing, I've realized I need to slow the mph way down. I'm getting caught up in the routine of the day to day and forgetting that life is happening and each passing day is one day closer to my last. It's one day closer to having to say good bye to my parents. It's one day closer to watching my children leave and venture out on their own. I'm realizing more and more that it's the moments and not the stuff that counts.

I feel like we are put in each others lives to build relationships and create feelings from those moments, because those feelings can be carried with someone their whole life. We can give someone special items every day but those things can break, they can be lost or taken, but when we give someone a moment of our time and create a feeling, they can never lose it, it can never be taken away. They can carry it with them forever. I want to spend more time creating moments that leave feelings so when my time is up, those around me will have something to hold onto. I can't do that by running 100 mph through the day to get to the next one. I have to slow down and enjoy the moments in each day because we aren't promised tomorrow.

I find myself always feeling like I can do things later when I have more time, but we all know we aren't getting anymore of that. There is barely enough time now to do all the things that we need to do, let alone what we want to do, so I'm just going to remind myself to let off the gas pedal and take in the moment that I'm in, because we can never get it back. I have this memory of sitting on my grandmothers lap while she would brush my hair and tell me stories when I was just a young girl. I can remember just a few days before she passed away I visited her in the care home, where I literally crawled in bed with her and laid on her chest where she brushed my hair with her hands and told me stories of when I was young. I could close my eyes and see us there in her rocking chair and we are both so young. I am so grateful to have had that moment with her. I would give anything to feel her embrace once more, if only for a moment. Then I wonder where has the time gone, she's been gone almost four years already.

I've rambled on sharing my thoughts, but I hope that you will find this encouraging to you. I hope you will slow down and make moments and memories and live each day as if you have no more time, because honestly, we have no way of knowing when we won't have anymore sand in our hour glass. Kiss your loved ones, book the vacation, make the move, do what makes you happy. Make time for what's important and leave someone with a feeling of you that they could never forget.